Introducing Google Tulip

By | January 20, 2020

Hello, nice to meet you. The Netherlands produce about 50% of all flowers in the world.
The most famous one of all? The tulip of course. Flowers are really remarkable organisms. We’ve know for decades that they can actually
communicate to each other through their root system.
For the past 2 years, Wageningen University has been working very closely with Google
to use cutting edge technology to look deeper into communication with plants.
Hello. We collected an incredible amount of information.
Using automated machine learning we turned this information into a new rudimentary language
which is becoming more and more sophisticated over time.
The more we listen to nature, the more we discover the amazing things it has to say. OK Google. Talk to my tulip. What do you want? Water, please. We’ve applied all this research into our latest
product. Google Tulip. Two granddaughters. Francis. Who just had
a second baby. That is so interesting. And… Finished. Nothing left. More. You promised more water. At Keukenhof we are very excited about tulip technology. We like to know what tulips need. And what better way than to ask them?
I need water. More light. Please improve humidity. What is a sun? Please come here. More space.
No more compost. Thank you. Who are you? Why are there so many
like me? More light. Of course this is only the beginning.
We’re rolling out the tulip language in the beginning of April but we’re already well
under way with several updates. Hello? No. Cactus? Leave me alone. It’s so great not to have a one-way relationship
with the tulips anymore. What is the meaning of my existence? Ssssh. Tulip is a breakthrough in human-plant-communication. Letting users around the world communicate
with any tulip. OK Google. Play my favorite music. Uh, yeah. That’s right. Uh. Yeah. Drop that beat.

100 thoughts on “Introducing Google Tulip

  1. Eve Mangam Post author

    I want to know what the tulips would say when they are picked. >:[

  2. phoebe jones Post author

    I don’t know whether to be proud or ashamed that I want this…

  3. Milky Rose Post author

    Alright google. You’ve had your fun. Now actually give me this cause my plants are dying and I genuinely would like to know what they need so….

  4. AZRIEL REYES Post author

    Video: *released March 31st*

    Me: *remembers Netherlands is few hours ahead of US time zones*


  5. exogíínos fairy Post author

    why does the logo lowkey looks like a philippine flag

  6. Fake Gaming Post author

    Can we appreciate that they spent that much money on a joke
    Me:(remembers google have aaa lllooottt ooofff mmoonneeyy)

  7. Bug Catcher Walace Post author

    Os maconheiros já conversavam com as plantas antes do Google…

  8. Arrow Cat Post author

    When the video said "ok google" at the end, Google assistant literally popped up on my phone and I was confused for a second

  9. falling stars Post author

    tulips are so pretty..but this is just hard to believe

  10. TonyT2i Post author

    I did this to my cactus he called my grandma gay and he said the n word

  11. RAJ SINGH SHEKHAWAT Post author

    Wow this is stupid! I mean really stupid. The amount of money spent on R&D of this technology could have been used to plant more real trees then talking to a jerk tulip.

  12. Robin Hugli Post author

    I hope my trashcan isn't going to talk and complain anytime soon

  13. p4sm4ter Post author

    Im seriously disturbed by this on many levels….. we dont need more technologically demanding things, we dont need google to talk to nature and why oh why does google have a sector that revolves around speaking with a tulip?! are they seriously trying to convince us that tulip is actually talking? and its kind of bitchy, like "you said you gonna give me water! " id be like, im one meter away from scissors, dont test me!…. honestly i dont need another thing to take care of, this tulip better learn to make me coffee in the morning!

  14. Ayesha Shahid Post author

    Plants feel.
    Let's all fight against vegans and step against plant cruelty. They been bothering us non-vegans for too long now. 😂😂

  15. Celeste Heinen Post author

    So basically, googles is letting flowers take control of our lives..

  16. Dundee Hance Orbisit Post author

    it's like a replacement for the pet that you have

  17. Muyasara Nilam Alifia Post author

    2:08 when it said "OK Google" my phone responded I'm dead🤣🤣

  18. Cassio Alexandre Post author

    Ok, so now Google is translating flowers and plants' "desires" to our language… I see… The worst of it is that there are people who really believe in that! My goodness!! 😖 🤦‍♂️

  19. Who Am i ? Post author

    "Okay google, talk to my tulip…."
    "What do you want?"

    world domination

  20. Purplecake OwO Post author

    Me: ok Google, speak to tulip
    Tulip: I require a blood sacrifice
    Google: order placed, package arriving on monday

  21. Purplecake OwO Post author

    Me : ok Google, speak to tulip
    Tulip : …..
    Google : order placed, "Parenthood on plants" arriving Wednesday
    Tulip : shush Google!
    Me : what have you been doing!!!

  22. Lilly like da flower Post author

    This is way better than it has any right to be

  23. Kishan Zala Post author

    Just read some indian mythology…
    Its already mentioned there…!!!

  24. Akari Minamoto Post author

    Was my Google assistant the only one that actually activated when the tulip said "Ok Google"? 🤔 Weird…

  25. missmacapaca Post author

    This set off my google home and now Spotify is playing, I’m crying

  26. Sakshi pal Post author

    Everything is fine… but how come this video from April 2019 is suggested to everybody in January 2020. 🙃

  27. Little Rick Post author

    Just what I need, a cat, a dog, a wife, 3 children and now a a fucking plant giving me orders.

  28. Alicia D Post author

    Before the foundations of the earth, the lamb was slain for our sins. Before the original sin that corrupted us, God had a plan to redeem us. We were born in sin and sin separates us from God. However, he loves us and wants to give us the choice to be with him. There are only two choices; God or the devil. To not choose God is to choose the devil because we are born into sin. We are not born children of God. We are his creation but to be his child is to receive Jesus, his son (John 1:12). 

    Breaking one of God’s laws is to break them all. No one can follow all of the law therefore, no one is good. No one can be justified before God. Jesus fulfilled every one of those laws because he was tempted but did not sin. He is our justification and our righteousness because anything we do ourselves to be righteous is filthy rags to God (Isaiah 64:6, Philippians 3:9). 

    Jesus is the only way to the father. Also, he is the truth and the life (John 14:6). Jesus’ blood made us worthy and spotless before God (Colossians 1:12 & 22 ). Believe in his death and resurrection that paid for your sin so even though you die in the flesh you will live in the spirit. 

    Believing in Jesus also means believing his word. It is not just knowing that he is God, demons believe that and tremble(James 2:19). Repentance is a change of heart towards sin that leads to turning away from willful sin. As we are human, we are not perfect. We sin but we are not to live in habitual willful sin.

    The desires of the flesh (carnal man) are opposite those of the spirit. They war against each other(Galatians 5:17). Jesus promised to fulfill those who believe in him with the holy spirit, the comforter. Someone to help us on our walk. It is not easy, not many choose it ( the way is narrow). He wants us to live a life separate from others and this is not accomplished in our strength. It is the Holy Spirit working through us that we may bear fruit (John 15:1-8).

    The world will hate you because they hated Him first (John 15:18). Eventually, you will see that all your suffering does not measure up to the glory he will reveal to us (roman 8:18). His children will become co-heirs with Christ so we will share in the glory (Romans 8:17). The great day of reckoning is coming when God pours out his wrath on the earth(revelation 16:1). Jesus will come back for his people and they will escape that judgment. All things will be made new and the former things will cease to exist (Revelation 21:4-5). There will be no more pain or crying. God will create a new heaven and new earth and he will dwell there with his people. There will be no need for the sun or candles and there will be no night because God will be the light (Revelation 22:5).

    Seek God first and everything else will be added to you (Matthew 6:33). Spend time praying and reading his word and getting to know who God is. Keep your focus on him and you will not fall victim to the schemes of Satan. We will all give an account of our life before God and our lives are short (James 4:14).

     "But without faith it is impossible to please him: for he that cometh to God must believe that he is, and that he is a rewarder of them that diligently seek him." Hebrews 11:6

  29. Prolivion Post author

    Imagine coming back home and your flowers start screaming at you

  30. Pj Brodber Post author

    Me in January 2020: This must have been an April fool's prank.

    This video: uploaded March 31, 2019

    Me: Must be legit then

  31. Ali Hasymi Post author

    Manusia sudah ke level selanjutnya… dulu diperbudak oleh sesama manusia, kemaren diperbudak oleh hewan, dan sekarang diperbudak oleh tanaman…. DUNIA

  32. Luis Arturo Cruz Cruz Post author

    What we will expect in the future? Google Chihuahua for Mexican? Google Pokemon / virtual anime girl for the Japanese people?

  33. Abdulaziz Alblehed Post author

    Is this a joke. Because it’s too early for April fools google!

  34. Marina Munsey Post author

    I know it’s a joke, but I n e e d this Google Tulip- “wHat iS tHE mEaNinG oF mY eXisTanCe?”

  35. Dabe /hanz Post author

    Am i the only one wondering if we could actually make this to reality it would be awesome

  36. naturegeek33 Post author

    Vegans: You kill animal life’s. They were conscious before you murderd them
    Me: sends this vid


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