How to Pitch Using Trigger Points (e.g. Job Postings)? – ✉Cold Email Teardown✉

By | August 21, 2019


One of the things that I recommend a lot when developing a cold email campaign is to start with trigger points. So reaching out to people when they express publicly on the web that they might need your service. One of those trigger
points is job postings. So if you’re hiring for a certain role that is a good time to reach out. Today’s cold email is what
happens when you get that wrong. In today’s video, I wanna
jump through a cold email that I got from this
company called Vantech, break it down and show you
how it could be improved, and how your emails could
be improved as well. So let’s jump into it. So here’s the email from Vantech, “Customer Happiness
Manager”‘s the subject line. I actually think that’s fine. “Dear Alex” You know, it’s always good to
just be more casual in emails. “We recently saw that
you were looking for a Customer Happiness Manager. “Here at VirtualEmily we have
the best talent to offer you “in the following areas.” Bunch of bullet points, a big picture, and then more sentences
that I’m not reading about. An attached PDF and then
the email signature. Off the bat, based on
some of the other videos, you know what I’m going
to say for some of this. So first of all, why is this image here? Get rid of the attachments. (click, click) Right? So that brings us already
to a much shorter email. Another note here is on tone. This is from Emily at Vantech, right? It’s not from “we.” It’s from Emily. So instead of writing “we,”
just write “recently.” I usually don’t like
starting emails with “I” because it makes the
email more me-centric, more about myself than
the client, the target. So getting rid of that all together is an easy way to jump that. So, “Hi Alex, Recently saw
that you’re looking for.” Actually like contractions a
lot, it makes it more human. “Recently saw that “you’re looking for a
Customer Happiness Manager.” The reason why I added, “and thought you might
find this interesting” to the sentence is I’m trying to give the target a reason to keep reading. Because right now it’s “saw that you’re looking for
a Customer Happiness Manager,” and it’s not really connected
to the second sentence at all. And this is going to be something that might be tough for
Vantech to implement unless they change their
cold emailing process, but based on this information, you know that it’s a customer
happiness manager position, So there’s no reason to talk
about sales, lead generation, appointment setting,
Virtual Emily Assistants, research and data base There’s no need to talk about any of this. Okay, so now this first sentence kind of grabs my interest a little more. “Hi Alex, recently saw that “you’re looking for a
Customer Happiness Manager, “and thought you might
find this interesting. “Our Virtual Emily Assistant
service lets you outsource “your lead generation
and appointment setting.” They’re still talking
about lead generation and appointment setting, but it’s Customer Happiness Manager. If they only wanted reach
out to lead generation and appointment setting clients, they should have gotten rid of the Customer Happiness Manager target, and focused only on new business, if they only wanna talk
about new business. ‘Cause right now this
email’s not relevant. So let’s actually say, they’re not targeting their
Customer Happiness Manager. Let’s say it’s like
Business Development Rep. “Our Virtual Emily
Assistant lets you outsource “your lead generation
and appointment setting “and focus on doing what you love, “while saving you money.” The problem with this pitch is right here, “and focus on doing what you love.” If you’re emailing a Director of Marketing or CEO, or anything like that, “and doing what you love”
isn’t going to appeal to them. It might appeal to an
entrepreneur at a tiny business, but those aren’t the kind
of clients that you want. So how can we change
this to make it better. “Our Virtual Emily
Assistant lets you outsource “your lead generation
and appointment setting “so that you or the sales team “can focus more on closing
deals and taking meetings, “instead of building lead lists.” And then I wouldn’t mention
“while saving money.” It’s much better to position
yourself as saving people time, than saving people money. As long as the service provides value. “Don’t worry about office
space, work hours, payroll “or project management. “Our services are all inclusive.” This is an unnecessary sentence. “Please let me know when it’s
the best time to call you,” could be phrased a lot better. For instance, as a question. “Hi Alex, Recently saw
that you’re looking for “a Business Development Representative “and thought you might
find this interesting. “Our Virtual Emily Assistant service “lets you outsource your lead generation “and appointment setting so that you “or the sales team can
focus more on closing deals “and taking meetings instead
of building lead lists. “Does this sound interesting
for Experiment27? “Let me know and I’ll send
over a few times for a call. “Also happy to send more information.” If you like this video,
feel free to subscribe for more B2B sales training. “Like” this video to encourage this type of content on YouTube. And if you need marketing
support for your digital agency, check out Experiment27.com. Thanks.

4 thoughts on “How to Pitch Using Trigger Points (e.g. Job Postings)? – ✉Cold Email Teardown✉

  1. abz121 Post author

    Alex – you're savage bro. You practically deleted the whole email! Hahaa you know I love your content. Keep them coming

    Reply
  2. Christopher Tilley Post author

    Great listen with some good pointers. I have been sending my new hire a number of your cold call/email videos and seen a huge sales jump with our team ramping up our cold emailing campaigns.

    Reply
  3. Dana Alan Maracchion Post author

    Hi Alex, any advice for overcoming G Suites Daily Email Restrictions? Im using Yesware also and have made the 4 stage pipeline like you have in your videos. Thanks!

    Reply
  4. Steve H Post author

    Hi Alex, what cold outreach email would you send tying to SEO for 1k+ per month? Thanks

    Reply

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