Camp Camp: Season 2, Episode 1 – Cult Camp | Rooster Teeth

By | August 16, 2019

David: *snore* Pine. David: *snore* Cedar. *snore* Gwen: Goooood morning, David! David: Goooood morning, Gwen! David: Wait- this feels backwards..?
Gwen: Yep! Gwen: But today’s the day! David: *gasp* You’ve realized your love of Camp Campbell and everything it stands for?! Gwen: HELL NO! David: “Help… Wanted?”
Gwen: That’s right. Gwen: Found a stash of cash Campbell hid in the quartermaster’s store behind a box of grenades. David: I don’t know, Gwen. Gwen: Are you sure we really need more help? *window breaks* *grenade hits the floor* Nikki: Sorry, foul ball! Gwen: YES. *furious knocking* ???: Hello, I’m here for the job listing? Gwen: Oh, my God! Yes! This is… ???: Gooood morning! *inhales, then exhales* ???: Smell that fresh mountain air! ???: Gosh, now that’s the kind of nature you don’t just find in any ol’ neck of the woods. Gwen: Oh dear lord no. David: Hello?
???: Oh, well, hello there friend! ???: Where are my manners? Daniel: My name is Daniel, Daniel: Your camp counselor applicant. Daniel: I hope I’m not too late to submit my resume. David: Too late? You’re the first one! Daniel: Ha! Are you pulling my leg? David: No leg-pulling here, but we are keen on handshakes! Daniel: Well, who isn’t? David: The name’s David. Daniel: Pleasure to meet you, David.
David: The pleasure’s all mine, Daniel. David: So, what sort of experience do you have? Daniel: Well, sadly, my old camp was recently shut down. Daniel: And ever since, I’ve been searching night and day Daniel: for a new group of eager young kiddos I can help to educate and reach their full potential! David: Did ya’ hear that Gwen? I think we just hit the jackpot! David: This was a great idea!
Gwen: Y’know… Gwen: I think now’s the perfect time for me to use my vacation days. Both: Aw, Gwen, are you sure? *Car drives off* David: Well, more fun for us! Come on, Daniel. David: I think you’re gonna fit in here juuuust fine! Daniel: I think so too David! I think so too… David: OHHHHH~ There’s a place I know
That’s tucked away; A place where you and I can stay Where we can go to laugh and play, And have adventures everyday! I know it sounds hard to believe But guys and gals it’s true, Camp Campbell is the place for me and you! We’ll swim through lakes and climb up trees; Catch fish, bugs, bears, and honeybees! There’s endless possibilities, And no, that’s not hyperbole! Our motto’s “CAMPE DIEM”
And that means I’m telling you We’ve got: Archery, Hiking, Search & Rescue, Biking, Horseback, Training that will save you from a heart attack, Scuba diving, Miming, Keeping up with Rhyming,
Football, Limbo, Science, Stunting, Pre-Calc, Spaceships, Treasure hunting,
Bomb defusal, No refusal, Fantasy, Circus trapeze, and Fights,
and Ghosts, and Paints, and Snakes, and Knives, and Chess, and Dance, and Weights– It’s Camp Camp! David: And that concludes my presentation on what is, and is not, a baseball. David: So, any questions? David: Yes, Max. Max: Who the fuck is that?! David: Why, what an excellent question! David: Campbell campers, I’d like you all to give a warm welcome to our newest co-counselor, Daniel! Daniel: Howdy kiddos! Space Kid: Howdy-do Daniel! Max: You’ve got to be shitting me. Daniel: Whoa, watch the language there little fella! David: Watch the language indeed! David: Just because Daniel here is new, doesn’t mean you should treat him any different David: than you treat me. Nikki: Got it! Max: He IS you, David! Save for the outfit. Max: Seriously, freakshow.
What’s with the cult leader getup? *ominous music*
Daniel: You must be Max. I’ve heard aaaaall about you. Max: Okay? David: Daniel, I am SO sorry about this TERRIBLE behavior. Daniel: Oh don’t you worry, co-counselor. Daniel: They’re just, “raggin’ on the new guy”. Daniel: I thought this might happen, and so for my first day as camp counselor, Daniel: I’ve prepared several exercises that are gonna help cleanse all of us Daniel: of our negative emotions! David: Well, that sounds WONDERFUL! David: You kids are definitely in good hands. David: I’ll go finish up your employment paperwork. David: In the meantime, try not to have too much fun without me! David: Just kidding, have all the fun you want! *door slams* Daniel: Sooo, children… Daniel: Is there anybody here who has an interest in… SPACE? Space Kid: OOH! OOH!! Oh, me! Me!!! Daniel: Oh, really? Well, that’s WONDERFUL! Space Kid: Yeah… I know all sorts of stuff about space. Daniel: Well, did you know that all negative emotions actually come FROM space? Space Kid: Uh. Well, I…. No. I-I didn’t. Daniel: It’s true! Daniel: Our atmosphere is under constant bombardment from negative emotions tied to dark toxins! *ominous music starts*
Daniel: These toxins cling to the matter left over from the Big Bang, Daniel: meaning that even if we’re all pure of heart at birth, Daniel:we’re bathing in a negative-rich
environment every SECOND! Space Kid: Whooooaaa. Neil: Oookay, I’mma stop you right there. Neil: Are you suggesting that the massive explosion responsible for the creation of the universe Neil: is also responsible for some sort
of endless, radioactive evil? Daniel: Oh, no. Not at all! Daniel: The Big Bang didn’t create the universe! It was just a side effect of the Millenia Wars, started by Xemüg and the Galactic Confederacy! Neil: Riiiight. *ominous music*
Daniel: You must be Neil. Daniel: David told me about you were quite the… inquisitive little fellow. Neil: He-hey, buddy. let’s try to recognize some… personal space here. Daniel: Why do you feel the need to question everything, Neil? What good has it led to? Neil: Well. For one, I’m not walking around,
talking about “Xemüg”. Daniel: But, are you happy with your life? Are you at peace? Or do you find yourself filled with anxiety and doubt? Doesn’t the world seem awfully scary? Nerf: It DOES! Daniel: Well, what if I told you it didn’t have to be? Nerf: I don’t really know what you’re selling here, Daniel… …but I am BUYING it! Daniel: Then help me, help you. ..Help others! YEAH! I’M HELPING!! Daniel: Excellent! Now who else wants to help and reach ascension? Max: Oh my fuck, he’s ACTUALLY- Max: A CULTIST! YOU HIRED A FUCKING CULTIST, YOU IDIOT! David: Whoa, whoa! What’s wrong, kids? And why aren’t you with Daniel? Oh. You mean the bat-shit crazy cult leader YOU just put in charge of the camp!?! Again with these cult jokes, Max? Please. Neil: He gave everyone a “de-toxification diet”, then started spouting off Latin from a book with a pentagram! He’s bilingual, AND cares about nutrition? Nikki: Hey, David? David: Yes, Nikki? WAKE UP AND SMELL THE KOOL-AID! *smack* If you don’t believe us, then come see for yourself. Daniel: Well! What a pleasant surprise! David, kids! Welcome! *in unison* Welcome! David: Wowzers Daniel! This all looks incredible! What’s it for? Daniel: Why, it’s to celebrate, of course! Your campers have all been SO cooperative, and by the end of the day, I know everyone here will be cleansed of their hateful ways and ready to ascend to the next level! Nikki: Hey, where ARE the campers? Daniel: Most are helping prepare for today’s festivities, But a few of them are still hangin’ around in the Purification Sauna! David: You built a SAUNA?! Max: THAT IS NOT THE WORD TO FOCUS ON, DAVID! Daniel: Dolph, Nerf, why don’t you show your friends to the sauna? So they’ll quit worryin’, and start hurryin’.. …their way to FUN! Dolph: So… who vants to go first? Preston: PLEASE! SOMEONE HELP ME! HELP MEEEE… Neil: I would just like to point out the fucked-up implications of specifically YOU putting specifically ME into a gas chamber. Dolph: Ah! This is no gas chamber! We just use high-pressured steam, and subliminal messaging to deconstruct your psyche, and rebuild you in a form that will please the Ancient Ones! Preston: *monotone* And I love it. *gasps* Ered: Oh, hey guys. You dudes are just in time to help prep for the killer party… Nerris: Daniel says that once we’ve all been cleansed, we shall consume this wonderful elixir, and ascend to our final form. *sips* QM: Hmm. Was better in Jonestown. Nerris: Isn’t that right, Daniel? Daniel: Right you are, Nerris! (Screams) Neil: MAX! DO SOMETHING! Max: You maniac! You brainwashed the entire camp! Daniel: “Brainwashed”? No, no, no! I just appealed to their emotions, and showed them the light! People don’t wanna think, Max! They just wanna feel safe. And feelings beat facts, ANY day! Daniel: Now… Don’t you wanna feel safe, too? David: THERE YOU ARE! I was wondering where everyone had run off to! Max: DAVID! Oh, thank god! You have to stop him! He’s insane! David: Max, I have had it up to HERE with your bad behavior today! Max: But it’s all right here! Right in front of you! Proof that Daniel’s actually a religious cult leader that’s gonna brainwash and kill every last one of us! Both: We love you, Daniel… David: Well, all I see are happy faces! Great work, Daniel! Daniel: Aw, shucks. Thanks David! Aaaall right kids, let’s start pouring that punch! And prepare for Ascension! All: YAAAAAY! Max: …Fine. If THINKING is too hard, I’ll do it Daniel’s way. David, you’re right. I’ve been awfully mean today. David: Aw, it’s okay Max. I know making new friends can sometimes be a little scary. Max: Well, it’s just because… I was scared for YOU! David: For me? I mean, it’s just so OBVIOUS that Daniel’s a better camp counselor than you. David: *nervously* What are you talking about? Max: Just look at him! In one DAY, he’s managed to get everyone happy and working together! Max: Something you and Gwen could NEVER do. Everyone LOVES Daniel! All: We love you, Daniel! David: W-well, that’s good! Max: Well, Good for US, sure. But you? Once Cameron finds out that ONE camp counselor can do the job of TWO… he’s DEFINITELY gonna let you and Gwen go. Cameron: Boy, I sure am glad I fired the HECK out of those other two loser counselors! All I need is you, Daniel! And no one else. David: Nnnn.. Cameron: I SAID, no one else. David: I can’t imagine a life without Camp Campbell! But, surely Daniel can’t be THAT threatening! I mean, it’s not like EVERYONE loves him. Right, Max? …Max? Max: I love you, Daniel *gasps* David: But… that’s not right. Max doesn’t love ANYTHING! Daniel: So, David. Care to join us for a drink? David: Hmph! Daniel. I-I’m actually afraid that.. we need to let you go. I just don’t think you’re a good fit for Camp Campbell. *spooky violins* Daniel: Oh. I see. Well, it is… unfortunate you feel that way, David. David: Yeah, I’m afraid it’s just not- Daniel: HOWEVER, as far as I’m aware, I’ve successfully met every requirement listed in my job description. So, YOU don’t actually have the legal right to terminate my employment. Unless, of course, you think there’s an aspect of this job I’ve yet to uphold…? David: As a matter of fact, there IS. You may be a good camp counselor, Daniel… But what good is a camp counselor, without camp SONGS? Daniel: *gasps* Why, David… I thought you’d NEVER ask! David: *Gasp* Hmph! *guitar strum* David:
I hope this won’t sound impolite Or come across as too forthright But even though you seem alright, I… Think I’m better than you! Now please do keep this thought in mind
That’s just my personal conviction. You’re smart and fun, you’re sweet and kind-
I’d call our friendship an addiction! Your shoes are shined, your breath: dulce
But still I find I have to say, I… Think I might be better than you! *fiddle playing* Daniel: You seem impressed with what you’ve shown,
But I don’t find it that compelling. You’ve sung my praise but not your own
And well, I think that’s pretty telling. But while we’re on the subject of
How I’m superb and leagues above, you Ought to know I’m number one. I know that might be hard to swallow~ (Campers: La la la la~) This hurts you just as much as me~ (Campers: Oo-oo-oo~) But when this song is sung then you and I’ll know That you’re just a nobody! *fiddle and guitar* David:
Well friend I don’t know what to say- Daniel:
Try starting with your resignation. David:
Let’s end this in the finale Daniel:
I’m dying from anticipation! David: You’re really great, but let me state
Daniel: You’ve been outdone David: You denigrate and seem to hate
Daniel: Now I’ve really won David: The fact I break to abdicate
Daniel: But it was fun David: Before I can asphyxiate, I…
Daniel: Your end’s begun, and… David: Think I might be better than you!
Daniel: Now I know I’m better than you! David: Don’t hate me because it’s true!
Daniel: And I’ll prove it to you, too! David: Just know, I’m…
Daniel: So watch as I identify David: Better thaaaan…
Daniel: The skill to show I qualify Daniel: Like keeping up this camp charade And tricking kids to drink Kool-Aid To sacrifice them-! Oh, wait… *ambulance sirens* David: Poor guy. Must have been some bad fruit punch. Max: *sigh* You’re a moron. David: Well, kids, I guess that’s the last we’ll be seeing of Daniel. From now on, it’s just you, me, and… …Gwen? Gwen: DAVID. Fire that FUCKING weirdo, because I found us our newest camp counselor: Jen! Jen: I”m really into fashion and trashy magazines! Space Kid: Howdy, Jen!

100 thoughts on “Camp Camp: Season 2, Episode 1 – Cult Camp | Rooster Teeth

  1. Ethan Gassmann Post author

    Adolf loves his new chambers to put people in to purify them.

  2. Sleepy Roo Post author

    I just realized @12:34 Daniel does his little neck twitch/crack thing…I've watched this vid at least 50 million times and I just noticed that, and that's honestly funny lmao.

  3. Gabii Animations Post author

    you can just b a r e l y hear nurf-

  4. Stranger Danger Post author

    Daniels teeth are as yellow as his hair

  5. Doublenerd 1 Post author

    Max is favorite it’s funny how it seems like a kids cartoon when there’s swearing

  6. Brittany ensinger Post author

    11:04 start of awesomeness 12:47. End of awesomeness

  7. Cara Grabowski Post author

    when daniel’s neck said 💥 i felt that

  8. D.V And stuff Post author

    We cant deny this was us when we first saw the show 2:54

  9. Melanie Shell Post author

    Those who came here from the Good Omens animatic:
    Thank me later

  10. Nobody Here Post author

    Daniel is secretly Popee The Performer hehe

  11. Chiko Chiko Post author

    Lmao even though max was brainwashed, his soul still knows that he doesn’t like singing

  12. crazy4aday Post author

    I am now worried about myself because I look exactly like Daniel

  13. Lost soul Gazer Post author

    Best song I’ve heard when I want to feel better than you~

  14. sammy james friend Post author

    i showed my mum and dad this thay loved it and then hated it but let me watch it ahah XD

  15. drinkbleech sifuentes Post author

    Could you please make a playlist of the songs you made please?

  16. KFC Manager Post author

    A little fun fact for you kiddies out there:
    The kool aid poisoning was a real occurrence that some sicko made his following drink poisoned kool aid.

  17. Kruz Garrett Keirl Post author

    I just realised Magic kid looks like bill cipher from gravity falls

  18. Chemical Pills Post author

    We aren't gonna ignore that Daniel pointed the middle finger to David ;-; 12:09

  19. Blueberry Rain Post author

    First problem-

    Who uses a violin for a campfire song?

  20. Sunny Moon17 Post author

    I wonder how he sings so fast,I can’t even do it that fast.

  21. Salty Cashew Post author

    David sleeps with a log of wood…….morning wood

  22. Grace Parks Post author

    This song puts the sound track of red vs blue to shame

  23. killakiwi13 Post author

    Does anyone else realize that daniel never blinks?

  24. AdaErika Post author

    After watching Ling Ling too long. That fiddle is on the wrong side. You never play it on that side even if you are a leftie also it doesnt have a bridge at all and I think the hand is wrong too. It's a TV show I know xD still

  25. Zsuzsi Rabi Post author

    Wait, who let Kevin out of Desert Bluffs?

  26. Killer_ Nightmare Post author

    Wait but no one is Sihting on Max????

  27. Totally Original Content Post author

    7:12 I swear his hitlers reincarnation

  28. Callum Mightytree Post author

    Time traveller: What year is this?
    Person: 2017….
    Time Traveller: Are you watching Camp Camp?
    Person: Uh… Yeah.
    Time Traveller: OoH! Cult Camp. That’s the first time we see Daniel!
    Person:……. The first? You mean he comes back?
    Time Traveller: K, bye bye ~ * fades away *

  29. Dr.derpy Post author

    Did any one else see Daniel and think


  30. Creative Cupcake Post author

    0:20 if you pause the video quickly u can see a box under David’s bed that says “Easy DIY repair” and has a picture of a guitar under it. Guess that explains how his guitar is always fixed after ep 1. (Also yEs i know this was 2 years ago but who cares 😂)

  31. Nair Garin Post author

    I adore Daniel xD yep. He is a great villain~
    This is my favorite Camp Camp episode with no doubts.
    And i Love the song of David and Daniel :3

  32. Johnyliltoe Post author

    I was not expecting to find a new favorite villain song in a comedy show.

  33. spirits life wolfy Post author

    1:46 wait then see daniel smiling before seeing the news paper tells you that he is bad he smiled not nevrous he smiled cause he thought of a plan i bet cause he did

  34. Patrick Thanos Post author

    "WAKE UP AND SMELL THE KOOL-AID" Me every christmas

  35. Jacko-trades Post author

    2:02 guys wasn't muffin tops something waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay different?

  36. Tsunayoshi Sawada Post author

    So that's where this song comes from…..

  37. Philip Hamilton Post author

    I didn’t know someone could trigger so many memories with just the strum of a guitar

  38. insomina 0w0 Post author

    Does anyone notice that the rat poison is the family safe boxes

  39. CrimsonKitty Post author

    0:08 max + positivity = success
    I love this show

  40. Mr other guy Post author

    i like the song. i have listened to it 37 times today. help me. this is not the first time i have listened to this song 37 times in a day.

  41. killeing Post author

    Nikki: Hey David 😛
    David: Yes NIkki 😀

  42. Bluejay Post author

    W A K E U P A N D S M E L L T H E C O O L
    A I D
    -Nikki 2017

  43. killeing Post author

    dear god that music duel they have at the end is so epic!

    "While I'm superb and leagues above you, aught to know I'm #1!!!"

  44. Bernarda Arce Post author

    Don't know if it's inappropriate to laugh so f hard but just putting it out

  45. Black Mask Post author

    "This is no gas chamber"
    If I ever saw that and herd it I'll call the cops

  46. Joebob Derby Post author

    Are we just gonna ignore the fact that Quartermaster is IMMUNE to rat poison?

  47. Mia Polanco Post author

    David is not ok

    He is friends with pills I think that he has depression

  48. Damon Badgett Post author

    Just started the episode, but…… scientologist?

  49. Kruz Garrett Keirl Post author

    Wait Gwen found the money behind a box of grenades🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔😱😱😱😱

  50. NoiZy GunZ Post author

    Who came up with the f*cked up Gordon Ramsey, danial

  51. nur hillawatul Post author

    When theyre about to handshake david wiggles his eyes and daniel did too

  52. Vortex Lord Post author

    Daniel sounds like an anti-hero or like Madara Uchiha.

  53. Kitty loves Cats Post author

    this is the best known episode of camp camp for me because of well the song obviously

  54. NatureAntoinetteDrew Post author

    I know I'm late, but before Gwen came in, the writing next to it made me cry *almost*, David just wants Max to be happy and content with his life, which is why he smiles so much. T^T

  55. Nathan Pettigrew Post author

    Muffin tops has some great deals, all you can eat steak and shrimp for $5, what is truly criminal is that ad is not on the front page…. Damnit now I want steak and shrimp

  56. Emilia Bowden Post author

    I saw the thumbnail and thought blonde David??
    Now I'm thinking blonde and bad David


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